I was just afraid of therapy. A friend said to me after narrating my experience “No you are not done with it, because how do you explain how you held unto this for so long without speaking about it?” Fear was just the reason and the thoughts of not being able to deal with yourself when people, things, and even habits are no longer in the picture. So I decided to talk about the need to seek help so no one thinks you are happy when truly you are not.
Why Therapy is Important
Our world needs more therapists, people need therapy, they need to be heard and spoken to, they need clarity, they need to make bold decisions, they need to let go of a lot of burdens and past, but they can’t because many do not buy the idea of meeting a therapist. I do not blame them because society is stereotypical about certain things of which going for therapy is one. Maybe these people are afraid of been called insane, broken, or rejected. But truth be told we are all broken in one way or the other. We are just a people too ashamed to speak about our brokenness, a lot of us stink from guilts of our past without knowing.
I attended this hangout some weeks ago, it is a forum I belong to “Shining star foundation”, I like to be with these people because in that forum everyone is welcomed. When I said everyone, I meant both good and bad, people with beautiful and ugly pasts and even present.
I like that we are able to freely talk about our experiences and not feel judged, I like that no one is ashamed to share that which in the past they must have really kept away, I like that we present our imperfections and think of ways to get better. To me this hangout became my therapy, because those moment when I felt I am worst I heard of stories that gave me reasons and made it easy for me to let go of my excesses.
Imagine, a homosexual freely expressing how he let go of his addiction, or someone talking about how her heart was broken and then another sharing how she was healed from heartbreak, imagine someone who developed a reading habit after years of drug addiction and waywardness, what about the story of that one who became a Doctor still even with his predicament, let’s also talk about the one who almost committed suicide but is there to teach us that suicide isn’t an option, the ones who have being abused and are mentally shattered because they couldn’t talk about it. Scenarios and real experiences.
No one was afraid to say he or she lost their virginity or has fornicated, I could go on because the list continues”. The point is everyone was free to express their pain, flaws, and excitement and no one was judged. We talk about everything in that forum which is nice, who said you can’t share your troubles?
I didn’t have a lot of people I talk to, I do not enjoy talking about my experiences with people I prefer to listen but sometimes I feel the need to be heard too. So the second time I attended this hangout, the anchor raised this song “reckless love of God by Cory Asbury” I have never heard of the song before then and the chorus of this song was basically what I defined this forum to be; here is a part of the chorus “Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God”.
I am not trying to be religious here or to talk about God; for me, the reckless love of God were the many people I saw in that hangout who showed vulnerability and shared what they must have seen as horrible but rather than being chastised about their pasts they were hugged, held, prayed for and accepted in love. They got an opportunity to find healing, healing comes when you have accepted your problem and you are willing to let it go. The need for therapy can never be over-emphasized.
While there are multiple reasons why people do not like therapeutic sections, people avoid talking about their mental related issues., they are afraid of being judged, doubted, mislead, abandoned, misinterpreted, and sometimes pride is a big issue, they are unable to let go, they are too afraid to let go. And this explains the numerous suicidal cases, if your heart can’t bear it anymore you take your life, or when you are faced with the pressure of thinking of it alone you become insane for overthinking, hence, my fear if our society does not advocate for therapy. Depression is already a big pang.
The last hangout was about identifying the major issues young people face in life and just when this question was raised, I saw the inflow of opinions, and I was overwhelmed, one thing that got my attention and which is “Identity crisis and the importance of correctional therapy”, most of us came from a dysfunctional home, most of us have dirty pasts, some of us are confused, we do not even know who we are anymore. Hence, it is advisable you seek help from a professional.
I heard young people like me complain about their fears, I knew deep down that everyone has a story to share but does not know whom to go to and is afraid to go for therapy. Why should I experience a therapy session as an overly sensitive person you must have asked yourself. Therapy aids healing.
I feel that way sometimes, and I know a lot of us to do, we have a lot of things bothering us, relationships we want to let go of, marriages that are choking, habits that are stinking, a society that is presently in a pool of blood, academic failures, financial backwardness, indecisiveness and a whole lot but we can’t even talk about them.
Why should you endure pain, why should you be hurt, why should you be shattered, why give excuses? It’s hard but it’s time we start seeking help, it’s time we start sharing our troubles, it’s time we let go of things that won’t work.
Why should you remain in a toxic relationship because you are afraid people are going to judge you, why should you be married when you do not want to, why are you afraid to get married due to failed marriages? why can’t you talk about your addictions? Why do you have to be forced to chase a particular dream? Why should you remain in Nigerian when the policies aren’t favorable, why can’t you talk about your boss who abused you, why do you have to take that job when it isn’t favorable, why can’t rape victims freely express themselves, why do people talk about their hurts after a long while.
Why can’t we all heal today? Just tell me why I can’t decide now to be the best version of myself? It is normal to find yourself upset about therapy but you should try it. We can only get better.
